Smile like you mean it

utteradoxography:
“beriala:
“ devsfan55:
“ stephenfuckingsondheim:
“ birtneyreneethomas:
“ andiamburdenedwithgloriousfeels:
“ multifacetedacg:
“ alrightanakin:
“ paramorefan061:
“ jaynmalackson:
“ henrysgeekymind:
“ OH MY GOD
”
someone collect her...

beriala:
devsfan55:
stephenfuckingsondheim:
birtneyreneethomas:
andiamburdenedwithgloriousfeels:
multifacetedacg:
alrightanakin:
paramorefan061:
jaynmalackson:
henrysgeekymind:
OH MY GOD
someone collect her ass i’m screeching
omfg 💀💀💀
I’m in cardiac arrest oh my god
OH COME ON NOW NOOOOO NOT MY HOUSE WITH THE COMMON MASTURBATION TIME OH MY GOSH WE’RE ALREADY BASEMENT DWELLERS AND THEN YOU GO AND SAY THIS I DONT EVEN WANNA STEP INTO THE COMMONS NOW
I knew there was a reason I was a Hufflepuff
My room mate just said: “So we’re all just sitting around diddling our diddles?”
That quote is by me #hufflepuff4lyfe
@beriala
@itsallintheeyeofthebeholder @the-nicest-angel-you-have This is great.
as hilarious as this is, jk’s first tweet has the college humour logo on it & i can’t find these tweets on her twitter
so this is most likely fake

drinklust:

once i got very drunk in a bar and my mum had to pick me up so i was trying to act normal by keeping the conversation so i asked her if shes a virgin and she looked at me with pain in her eyes and said “i wish i was”

“My only relief is to sleep. When I’m sleeping, I’m not sad, I’m not angry, I’m not lonely, I’m nothing.”

– Jillian Medoff, Hunger Point (via amargedom)

fuckyeahgracebaldwin:

stoar-punk:
trashpunx:
shit-in-yer-cereal:
tastefullyoffensive:
Notes from Management [ardentleprechaun]
how is he not fired
I want to be Shane’s friend.
I aspire to be Shane
The albertsons one is golden haha

queen-of-the-highhway:

pearswhy:
professor on the first day of class: *says the fuck word*
all the freshmen in the room: :O
“The fuck word”

midnightcelebs:

Anna Kendrick

“It doesn’t take a lot of strength to hang on. It takes a lot of strength to let go.”

– J. C. Watts (via reminds)